Wednesday, February 3, 2010


I can certainly think of a lot of things I'd rather do than lie on a cold metal table and have people messing around my lady parts, but it wasn't awful.  Quite frankly, at this point, having been up for more than 24 hours is worse than the crampies from the hsg.   If you don't want to hear about the procedure, skip this next paragraph, I won't be offended.

My sister and I got there a little early and reported to my usual waiting room.  The nurse then called my name and took my blood pressure, and asked me a couple of questions.  Then, she pulls out the map.  Now, mind you, the University of Iowa Hospital is ginormous.  We had wind our way through the maze and find Diagnostic Radiology.  It was seriously a LONG way from my RE's office!  When they called me back, I had to wind around some more.  I was really beginning to think I was being punk'd.  Finally, I get my clothes changed and get in the room.  The very nice x-ray tech had me lie on the cold metal table (seriously? Can't they make it warmer in there?  Some of us are going commando!), where she took a couple of shots of my stuff pre-dye.  Then, the physician's assistant came, and they started the procedure.  Let me tell you this:  no one warned me before I went that there was going to be lidocaine shot into my cervix!  Granted, that part wasn't the worst, but still, I had no idea!  Anyway, that part was less than awesome.  In fact, I think I got a little dizzy at that point, but I don't remember.  Then they shot the dye up, and it was VERY crampy.  I mean, I didn't cry or anything, but I think I said, "Wow! That IS crampy!"  They had me do all sorts of stupid human tricks like rolling side to side and holding my hips at a 45* angle and lying on my stomach, which is all quite fun while trying to avoid flashing people unnecessarily.  They got the shots they wanted, so I sat up and waited for the PA to come back to talk to me.  I quizzed the tech about what I was seeing on the screen (Is my uterus supposed to be shaped like that? I always pictured it bigger.  What's that white thing? When can I put my pants on?)  The lady came back in the room and said everything looked good.  My right ovary is evidently up significantly higher than the left one, which she attributes to my being overweight (while we're on that subject, does this lady not realize that I'm AWARE of that issue and I'm working on it?  She stinking dwells on it and it makes me want to kick her...or eat her for lunch, since she seems to think I'm a big fat fatty.).  She also said that the lining of my uterus is a little more jagged than usual, but that could just be because I went so long without a period that my lining didn't shed all the way during this past period.  I wouldn't be surprised.  This period didn't seem nearly as bad as I was thinking it should be based on the 90-ish day cycle.  I got dressed and found my way back to my sister, who was sleeping in the waiting room.

The other thing to report is that I called them on our way home to have them get started on our pre-authorization for infertility treatment with our insurance.  CIGNA says that it can take 20-30 days, so I figured we should get a move on.  The next step is 5 days of femara followed by 3 days of follistim.  I'm supposed to continue losing weight (Yeah, lady, I get it! Lose weight.  Check.  Yep.  Doing it!  Sheesh!), and call when I hit the goal they specified and they'll bring me in for baseline ultrasounds and teaching on the follistim pen.  When I got back to my grandma's to pick  up Asher, I got a call from the RE's office saying they'd talked to my insurance company, and gotten everything taken care of.  We really don't need a pre-auth, she said, but she gave CIGNA the codes and stuff in case they decided to be doofuses about it.  She also said that we have the best infertility coverage that she's seen in quite awhile, so that makes me feel pretty good.

I'm sincerely hoping that we can get the ball rolling on this.  I'm not getting any younger! lol  In the meantime, I'm feeling crampy and when I laugh or strain, my cervix hurts where she shot me with the lido.  I'm also grumpy and have accidentally taken it out on my husband multiple times.  He's bringing home pizza, which I know is counter-productive to the weight loss, but I'm writing it off as a post-gynecological procedure requirement.  I'm willing to write it on the information they gave me beforehand.  Don't even try to stop me, Physician's Assistant Lady!  I. Will. Fight You!


Brenda February 3, 2010 at 8:04 PM  

gosh this lady is after you, the bananas are after you. Lighten up people!!! I'm glad it went better than expected. Praying all the time for you. :)

Marla.z February 3, 2010 at 8:19 PM  

You deserve pizza! Enjoy it!

Alena February 4, 2010 at 1:33 AM  

I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Brenda February 4, 2010 at 11:15 AM  

Oh and what is Kayla doing in the waiting room sleeping??? I would so be in there with you making inappropriate comments about people seeing your lady parts and asking the dr's hard questions for you. Then I'd take you out for coffee where we would laugh about how laughing was making your cervix hurt. Sometimes you gotta laugh. I'm here for you baby!! :)

Wishing 4 One February 4, 2010 at 11:16 AM  

You should of ate her ass for lunc, you made me laugh on that one. You know what would have been cool, when you were on the table and getting dressed, you should have whipped out a candy bar or something and started eating it and offered some to her, bitch! LOLLLLLLLLLLL

LowFat February 4, 2010 at 5:07 PM  

I am so glad everything went ok and you got good results :)

Anonymous February 11, 2010 at 3:49 PM  

Wow, you had a totally different for of HSG than I did. I had an ultrasound one. And no lido to the cervix. Which, may be why mine hurt so badly. Glad to hear that yours went well, though :)