Thursday, October 22, 2009

I Met the Adoption Worker (Finally!)

...It's only been 3 stinking months!  Geeze!

We were told, when Asher's goal was changed to adoption in April, that we just had to wait for our 6 months to be up, then we could get started on the adoption.  (In Illinois, the child has to be in your home for 6 months before you can start the adoption process.)  I called them on July 30th (our 6 month date), and left a voice mail asking to get started on it.

Lo and behold, in late October, I finally meet her for the first time!  I was nervous/excited beforehand, hoping to get a big pile of paperwork to get started on, etc.  Except, that didn't happen.  She told me that she's working on 9 adoptions right now, so it will be around 3 MONTHS before she even gets started on ours!  ugh!  I mean, I know people have to wait longer, but I just want to get it done!  He's so mine, anyway, that I just want to make it legal!

So, she told me to call an attorney to let him know that we're adopting a foster child.  The funny thing is, she's not allowed to tell me or give me a list of lawyers who work with the state of Illinois to do these adoptions.  Lucky for me, my mom and dad did it earlier this year, so Nick called my mom and got the name of their guy and is going to call him today.  The beauty is that this guy has done a million of these adoptions and gets his payment directly from the state of Illinois.  So, no out of pocket expenses for us!  (Not that I wouldn't be willing to pay to adopt him, but it's a nice perk to not have to! Know what I mean?)

Anyway, Asher was his usual, adorable self and she said she was going to take him home with her.  He ate up all the attention and all is well.  I guess we'll just stay status quo until the new year.


Brenda October 22, 2009 at 10:41 AM  

I HATE WAITING! I can't even wait in line at Starbucks. I can't imagine waiting for precious Asher to be officially yours! He's worth the wait, but still. Man, I love that kid. Glad he got blessed with the best parents ever :) Can't wait till it's official. I might even have to come for the party! (I don't eat cake so I'm cheap!) Love ya!

Lynn October 22, 2009 at 1:08 PM  

I hate that you're having to wait! I know you just want all the fuss over and for the adoption to be DONE! I guess, in the meantime, you'll have to console yourself with the fact that you KNOW you're his mommy and HE knows you're his mommy. In the end, that's the thing that matters most! I'm crossing fingers though that things happen very quickly for you and, before you know it, you can officially call Asher all yours!

Melissa G October 22, 2009 at 3:15 PM  

A big congratulations to you for your upcoming "legal" commitment. I think it's absolutely wonderful that Ashers been welcomed in to a loving home.

Best wishes for a speedy process!

Ashley October 22, 2009 at 6:47 PM  

Waiting sucks!! DH and I have been fostering. We started out with three teenagers then had two little guys we were so in love with. Adoption was mentioned to us and we were super excited, but they randomly got moved to live with grandparents. We still don't regret it!

I'm so happy you get to adopt your little guy! Big congrats!


WannabeMommy October 22, 2009 at 6:55 PM  

How wonderful you've found such a beautiful child to be yours! Congratulations on the impending adoption!

Happy ICLW!

Hillary October 22, 2009 at 10:52 PM  

That is such a long wait -- that must be so tough. I'm sorry but am glad you now have a lawyer and can keep moving forward!!

The Flukens October 23, 2009 at 10:51 AM  

Trust me, I know what you are going through! It is crazy how long they take. But the fact remains that he is yours now no matter what. Just enjoy each day and adoption day will be here soon!!

April October 23, 2009 at 6:13 PM  

I hope things move quickly so that beautiful little boy will be officially yours! Best of luck!


Jill October 24, 2009 at 12:51 AM  

How exciting that you get to adopt your little guy. How wonderful for all three of you! I always hear from everyone that these things move so slow. I hope it is as painless as possible. Good luck and congrats!

Happy ICLW!

Anonymous October 24, 2009 at 10:26 AM  

Ugh waiting sucks! I hope it doesn't take too long, or feel like forever. Asher is so cute and I love his name!

Thanks for commenting on my blog too! =)

jill October 24, 2009 at 11:31 AM  

Wow it's so crazy that stuff takes so long. There are probably so many children that need to be adopted, you'd think they would work out a faster way to get things done.

Asher is such a great name and he's so cute :)

Thanks for your comment on my blog - I really appreciate the encouragement! And, it's so true, no one said I have to like it, I just need to keep doing it! hehe

Lisa October 24, 2009 at 4:31 PM  

I love what you and your husband have done in taking Asher into your home and hearts. Bureaucracy is always a royal pain and bureaucrats hate being reminded that they work for a tortoise, not a hare. Be patient, knowing that it will happen. I think the lifebook sounds like a great idea. While I can certainly understand where you're coming from, regarding the photos with, and information about, his extended birth family, someday Asher may very well be interested in knowing where he came from. IMO, the more openness and detail you can offer him, the more he will appreciate it coming from the parents he loves.
Lisa (ICLW #100)

tireegal68 October 24, 2009 at 5:20 PM  

congratulations on your next step. sorry that there is so much waiting!
Asher looks adorable and he is obviously deeply loved by you and your dh:)
good luck with the adoption!

Jaymee October 24, 2009 at 10:47 PM  

these are the stories that make me ashamed to be a social worker. i understand that people are busy, but learn to multi-task a caseload of 9 is not that much and taking 3 months to return a call is just plain unacceptable.

thank you for being patient, hearing people like you dealing with the system gives me a bit of hope. i am so excited for your family.


Suraita October 25, 2009 at 5:57 PM  

This must be so frustrating to wait through but it sounds good that things are moving forward and it sounds like having a very experienced lawyer will help the process.

Hoping the time until you make it legal flies by - at least as much as it can!


Jacksmom October 26, 2009 at 4:49 AM  

I am so not a patient person, so I have to applaud you for letting them go this long before meeting the adoption worker. I think I'd take gas if she showed up just to tell us that she wouldn't be able to do anything for another 3 months. Couldn't she just tell you that on the phone? I digress, nice to meet ya through ICLW! Good luck!

A baby for Al? October 26, 2009 at 9:39 PM  

Another three months on top of the three months you already had to wait?! That sucks. Hope the lawyer starts moving things along and makes it official quickly.


Chelle October 27, 2009 at 8:56 AM  

How frustrating! I hate waiting when it is something you want so badly you can taste it and then you have to wait for MONTHS. I guess it gives you plenty of time to plan the party you will throw when everything is finally legal.

romancing_the_stone October 27, 2009 at 5:17 PM  

Hey Krystal, This is beautiful news. Some things are worth waiting for (even though it sucks to wait!). My very best to you and your family.

romancing_the_stone October 27, 2009 at 5:17 PM  

Oh yeah! Happy ICLW!

Heather October 27, 2009 at 9:48 PM  

Congrats on getting to move forward, even if it is in a stop and start sort of way. I hope it's smooth sailing from here on out!

Lara (NoodleGirl) October 28, 2009 at 7:49 PM  

Thanks so much for your comment on my blog.

GL with patience, I have a tough time with it, though it sounds like Asher is well worth it! I understand the case worker is working on 9 adoptions now, but THREE MONTHS?? Is she working 40 hours a week exclusively on one adoption at a time? I find that hard to believe, there must be alot of overlap. Hmmm, fishy.

Stacie October 29, 2009 at 2:13 AM  

Thanks for the birthday wishes on my blog! :-)

I hate waiting also, especially for fomething special like this most certainly is! How great it will be when your little guy is officially yours! :-) Good luck and congrats.


Anonymous November 15, 2009 at 9:02 PM  

That has to be SO frustrating. We are looking at our options right now (adoption is one of them) and I live in IL too - I'm not really crazy about the adoption laws here...